-------- "This is the time for action not only words, use your God given gifts to develop this country, dont be afraid to speak up, and feel PROUD THAT U R EGYPTIAN." -------- Mohaly, Feb 2011

Friday, April 6, 2007

Marriage.....Mind the -age- Gap!

Should age difference (whether positive, equal, or negative) be an important criterion in choosing your life partner? and if it does, what is the age gap that is acceptable and "normal"?

Mohaly

11 comments:

Yasmine said...

I've always believed that age difference shouldnt be big in a couple, because if i'm sharing my life with someone, i'd want them to have the same memories, to have lived through the same phases and times at the same age...
i was never interested in older guys, and i tend to get attention from younger guys (maybe it's because i look a lot younger than my age, but then they aren't bothered even after they find out my age)...
i could bring in the maturity argument, but then again, age is just a number, and it has been proven time and again that age and maturity are completely unrelated.

Tamer Mokhtar said...

masa2 el khair :)
i agree with you ya farahat, the age different shouldn't be big.

but practically "sa3et el 2adar ye3ma el bassar" but still it's part of the package, and having a packages means compromising "da yesheel da"

Yasmine Ismail said...

Although age gap is an important issue in marriage (coz of the reasons yasmine pointed out) but how big is the gap is not important. I can't say i want someone who is 3-5 years older than me. It doesnt mean anything.

Mutual understanding, and respect are the basic key even if he is younger than me.

Y.I.

bo2bo2 said...

"i could bring in the maturity argument, but then again, age is just a number, and it has been proven time and again that age and maturity are completely unrelated."

quoting yasmine

that's right u can marry someone who is ten years younger than you if he is mature enough and vice versa if u can share the same interests in life and have the same maturity "level"

khateeb said...

Age is nothing but a number i agree and this is true but... i strongly believe that "Birds of feather fly together" i will not bring myself to love someone 5 years above or below me, yet this might change as i get older or richer...

omar said...

ma3lesh ya khateeb, but i am confused from your last comment, because i feel it is contradiciting (age is just a number, and you cant marry 5 years younger!)

Are you for or against the idea of setting an age difference range?

khateeb said...

i am for having age difference range as long as u have the choice if u r single if u r in a relationship other things are more important

Fatiflower said...

the age factor difference is important, I guess that no one of you is married yet. When you'll be married you will discover why this importance.
As Yassmine F said you have " to have lived through the same phases and times at the same age..." as we say in Arabic "Ely Fatak beleelah fatak be7eela". I beleive that the age gap shouldn't be lesser or upper than 3 to 4 years.
Exemple:
I have a (friend) who got married at 21 with a guy who was 35 (she is currently 25 and he is 39) both of them have been to the university but they cannot speak the same language because the husband is pretending to have more experience than her and he knows better than her what works and what doesn't...he even doesn't give her the opportunity to meet people and know them becasue he judges from the first sight that the person isn't worth to be known..etc.

At the end, age is not the main only factor that should be taken into consideration but there are other factors which are complementing each other to get a positive result in marriage.

Eh ya Mohaly naweet khalas :)

Mohaly said...

yes i did ya Fatima
will take it seriously after the surgery full recovery in-shaa Allah.

Fatiflower said...

Eh 2agahez a lista beta3et el candidates ely 3andy walla eh :D Enta 3aref w ana 3arfaH;)

not (TR) said...

I say that the gap shouldn't exceed 20% of the youngest age(either way, I don't mind marrying a girl who's older than me). Life is like a chain of consecutive phases, so if you wanna marry, you have to find someone that shares the same phase with you, you have to stand on common ground. I know that we all come down from educated families and we're open minded enough, but if you marry a girl who's 15 years younger than you, what will you have in common?
you can't keep her at home, you don't have the same memories, even in any conversation you won't be talking at the same level of experience.

I have a relative who's 17 now, I was talking to her one time when she mentioned something that she hated when she was too young. It struck me because I was a grown up 10 years ago!!!
I can only marry someone like her when I'm 60(if she's 49 that won't be too much of a gap(back to the percentage)).
And about understanding each other, try to understand your parents, why is it always hard to communicate with them as friends?