Ghada has been tackling the issue of females not getting married in Egypt and passing on her experience through a character (herself) called "Bride". The book is hilarious, and she really is very honest and reflects the reality of what happens in the Egyptian families, and the potential husbands in gawz el saloonat.
But as a guy, there is the other side of the story that I think should be covered in a counter-book may be called "mesh 3ayez atgawez" because lots of us as guys lost faith in marriage and became afraid (for many reasons) to hook our lives up with an Egyptian "family" till the rest of our lives!
Mohaly
Not only guys ya Mohaly, lots of Egyptian girls rafe3een 3alam mesh 3ayza atgawez, dah yerga3na tany lel meca and orga options :)
ReplyDeleteI don't think there is one good reason for anyone to sign a contract to sell his soul to a devil he knows nothing about. And even if marraige become an option akeed it should never be done 3ala tare2et el saloonat. I personally call it gawaz el gawamees.
I even once called it "legal prostitution" a term that once opened hell fire on me. bas this is the truth lel asaf as far as things are being done the way they are now.
يا سلام اية الكلام ده جواميس و قرف و مش عايز اتجوز
ReplyDeleteطب انا عايزة اتجوز
عايزة اتجوز
عايزة اتجوز
عايزة اتجوز
يعني دي سنة الحياة و شريعة ربنا و احنا اتخلقنا عشان نعمر الارض مش نقول ده مقرف و لا جواز جواميس يا شيماء في جوازات كتير صالونات ناجحة و كتير فاشلة و جوازات كتير عن حب ناجحة و كتير فاشلة ده مش مقياس ده نصيب , ربنا لو كاتب لحد يتجوز حد هايتجوزه سواء بقي كان جواز جواميس ولا بهايم
و اللي مش عايز يتجوز ها قول له كلمة واحدة
بكرة تندم يا جميييييييل
tayeb gameel ya Hagar, 3ayza tetgawezy lieh?
ReplyDeletelist 5 good reasons, list the things that only marriage can do for you?
As for e3mar el ard part, I guess e7na 3amarna el ard kefaya it is about to explode :) :) :)
gawaz el saloonat the way it is now, is a pure gawaz gawamees, gamoosa 7elwa we tor monaseb are being matched by nas la te3raf el gamoosa 3ayza eh wala el tor kan nefsoh fi eh. el 3'arad mn el gawaz zay ma2olty keda e3mar el ard (sex, kids and they are done). This is not my idea of marriage, I won't buy a bull for some little suasage and I won't get kids in the time elly momken adman fih el gana bekafalet yateem. For me marriage is something more, it is something sacred. It might be the right thing to do, but it should be done for the right reasons and in the right way. mesh abdan en someone who doesn't know who am I yegebly 3arees kol elly beyfakar fih enoh yefresh el sha2a bekam wel fara7 bekam we mesh mohem el 3aroosa kol el banat zay ba3d wel noor lama beytefy mafeesh 7aga betfre2. naga7 el gawaz ba3d keda maloosh 3elaka betafahom el tarafien, le2n 7ata elly ye3rafo ba3d mesh beykono motafhmeen 100%, naga7 el gawaz marboot asasan bedarget el sabr wel ta7amol. 3ashan keda fi nas te2ool el salonat betnga7 aktar, lw dah sa7ee7 haykoon le2n el metgawezeen salonat 3amalo akhta2 kefaya we beykhafo yanfaselo 3ashan dah e3lan en el process kolha kanet fashla. we 3ashan asbab tanya keteera yetool shar7aha
el mohem I will really like to know your opinion ba3d 8 yrs :)
asl el banat ya benty are like el gebna el romy, kol lama te3ta2 kol lama tekoon a7la. Ashofek keda ba3d 8 yrs lw makonteesh etgawezty hatkony lessa bet3'any nasheed 3ayza atgawez, wala lama ye2olelk fi 3arees 3ayez yeshofek hatkony mot7amesa wala hat7esy enk yariet 7ata gamoosa, la2 goz gazma el bieh beyegy yebos yeshofoh 7elw wala la2.
اولا يا شيماء انا بشوف عرسان صالونات كتير و ده مش عييب و نفسي طبعا اتجوز عن حب و مين مش نفسه
ReplyDeleteما فيش حد بيتجوز بالصورة اللي انتي بتفتكريها في الصالونات ثم جواز الصالونات ده لاهو في مصر بس و لا العالم العربي بس لكن في العالم كله و هاديكي مثال
عندك مثلا في فيلم اجنبي و رومانسي و كله شقاوة و واحدة زعلانة ان صاحبتها منغير بوي فريند تقوم الجدعنة شغالة و تظبطلها واحد جامد و يتقابلوا هما الاتنين
و الاتنين بيكونوا عارفين انهامقابلة متلافقة و بيشوفوا حصل توافق ولا لا لو حصل بيتقابلوا تاني و هكذا و يمكن الفيلم يكمل و يتجوزوا
نفس الكلام هنا يعني اهل الجاموسة اقصد العروسة مش بيجروها من رقبتها و يالا يا بهيمة علي بيت جوزك منغير ما تعرفه ولا تقعد معاه عشروميييت مرة لحد ما تقول هو ده و بحبه يا بابا و لو مش عاجبها يبقي بالسلامة يا شربات و حصل خير و الواد بترجعله حاجته
و بعد الشر بعد الشر لو قعدت 8 سنيين زي الجبنة الرومي ولا عشرين سنة و خللت هاقول برده عايزة اتجوز
و انتي يا ستي عايزة قائمة
خدي يا ستي عندك
مين فينا بتصحا من النوم مابيكونش نفسها يكون في جوز ملاقح جنبها و يصحي
منعكش و يقولها بحبك
مين فينا مابتحلمش ببيت دافي تحس فيه بكيانها في كل ركن فيه
مين فينا مابتحلمش يكون لها ابن من صلبها مش مستلفاه من الجيران
تضمه بحناناها لقلبها و تربيه و تفرح بيه
مين فينا ما بتتمناش تنام علي صدر حبيبها و ترمي كل هموم الدنيا ورا ضهرها
مين فينا مش نفسها بعد جواز عشرين سنة تقعد تبص علي صور جوازها و اول مولود ليها و دي لما اترقت في الشغل و دي لما ابنها بدء يحبي و دي لما حب و قالي انا عايز اتجوز يا ماما
يا شيخة دي كفاية كلمة ماما دي لوحدها بالدنيا و ما فيها
ملحوظة : موضوع ان احنا عمرناها خلاص في لحظة ممكن تلاقي الارض دي مش عليها ولا مخلوق بأمر ربنا ثم انا مابقولش نبقي ارانب و نجيب بالعشرة التعمير لا يقصد بيه كدة و ألا كان كفاية الحيوانات بتعبده و بتخلف و بتعمر الارض برده
Hello Again Hagar
ReplyDeleteI won't argue your reasons, you might have apoint but :) and el kelma di bet3'ayar 7agat keteer, in the family I live in you are not allowed to meet 3arees el 3'afla more than once before you give an answer, yes = engagement, no = a fight, or momken tetganeny and te2oly agaweb lama abloh tany or mesh 3arfa akarar and here el dema3' el se3edy tetla3 we tesma3y kalam mn no3 lieh, howa enty 3ayza tegarbeeh el awal wala eh.
The step-ups u described el nas fiha betet2abel we mesh fi neyteha el gawaz asasan. As a person mesh 3arfa ezzay wa7ed or wa7da ye2abel 7ad benyet el gawaz, bas a3araf en momken a2abel 7ad benyet to get to know him and see where things will go. It will usually go fi 2arab 7iet :)
Anyway, if you are lucky enough enk to get to meet 3arees el 3'afla 100 mara, then get engaged with the option enek termeloh 7agtoh we ma7desh ye2olek ya3ny eh tetfeskh khotobtek, wala betgarbeeh wala kol el 7agat di, you are so lucky enek mn alex and ma3ndkeesh 3er2 se3eedy, 7adana fi el other face of the moon No is better than el bahdala.
And 7adana in the planet Shimaa where motherhood isn't the essential need, and the warm home is hers and men mesh me7tageen yenamo 3ashan yetnkesho we ye2olo ba7bek :) Marriage might be the right thing but will never be done for the wrong reasons
hi guys, I liked this topic. but with my respect to your point of view i don't agree with u mohaly or you shaimaa as well. may be marriage has alot of cons like problems and so on but also it has alot and alot of pros.at least when you get older you will find someone to share your life with you with his love and care. may be I'mnot planning to take such a step now but I'm really longing to start up my family with someone i really love. u made me feel with your expersions about marriage that u gonna start a fight not a holy relationship.
ReplyDeleteI think that when u have to be afraid mohaly, u sholud afraid from not hooking your life with a family to stand beside you anytime you are down specially when u get older. don't think about yourself now when u are still young have alot of friends around you and also have a good health. just think about urself within 10 years as an ex. what will u do.( long term planning ;) )
i think that this deserve that u hook ur life up to them.
and for you shaimaa may be i don't like the idea of ( gawaz el salonat) and i won't get married with this way ever but it's not that bad. at least from my point of view this is (best of the worth as they say) i do respect this better than having a boyfriend and start arelationship haram asln wy ne3ml blawey and at the end it's over. at least this relationship fel nor odam ahlk mafesh haram fy keda.
u r right only love about marraige and long term planning, but my point as a guy is kind of different than what you were commenting on... I was saying that we (guys) are afraid from loosing our idependence, dreams,..etc if our wives have this possessive way of looking at marriage (egyptian way) and the word family in the post means the bigger families. I definately want to get married specially that maleesh fel hags, but I do wanna establish a family where all its members helps each other to fulfil their personal and small family dreams, without any influence from the older families as well, and in salonat marriage the possibility of having the bigger families controlling the lives is higher.
ReplyDeleteBy the way Hagar, we also dream of having a cute face to see in the morning, a lovely supportive wive when we are back from home, someone we can feel that we can protect and she feels safe with us, someone who can raise our children right, someone who after 30 years wont regret sharing our life with... so ANA 3AYEZ ATGAWZ, But ANA MESH 3AYEZ ATGAWEZ BEL TAREE2A DI, el mosseba that it seems that the saloonat is becoming the higher option as one grow older!!! rabena yostor!
علي فكرة يا شيماء انا مش من اسكندرية انتي جبتي الكلام ده منين انا اساسا يعني الجذور بتاعتنا من سوهاج يعني الصعيد الصعيد ولا يزال فكر بابا صعيدي بس مودرن متفتح و مثقف و مش بيضغط علينا في حاجة
ReplyDeleteو يا جمااااااااااااااااااعة انا عايزة اتجوز عن حب جدااااا بس انا بؤمن بالقدر , ما يمكن عريس الصالونات ده يكون هو قدري و هو ربنا كاتبه ليا و ماكنتش هاتعرف عليه غير لما اشوفه صالونات اهو مافيش حد بياخد اكتر من نصيبه و قدره
و لو جه واحد عن حب خيط و بكرة ده انا نفسي يحصل ربنا يبعت بس هو يجي بس و اشوفه
ربنا يرزقك بأبن الحلال اللي نفسك فيه
و ملحوظة انا ماكنتش اقصد بكلامي اننا نجرب و ان كان ماعجبناش نرميه لية هو جوز جزمة مش ده خالص قصدي بس في لينك بيحصل بينك و بينه لو ماحصلش من اول مرة يبقي مش هايحصل
only love
انا مبسوطة ان في حد عايز يتجوز و في صفي بدل ما انا كنت عاملة زي النخلة في الصحرا لوحدي كدة و هبلة و بهاتي ع الفاضي ربنا يرزقك ببنت الحلال و يكملك بعقلك
Mohalyيااستاذ
اية الموقف المعادي ده من البنات المصريات لية ان شاء الله دول حتي من نفس منبت الارض السمراماحناش جايين من كوكب تاني بنتكلم هاشو هاشو ولا بناكل اجوازنا ولا دماغنا خاوية اننا مانفهمش حياة الراجل الجليلة
ماحنا زي الفل و بنتحمل الاسية دي الست المصرية دي يتعملها تمثال
ثم يعني ماهماش الرجالة المصريين عدليين اوي عشان يقولوا علي اي ست مصرية كلمة داحنا شايفيين بلاوي و ساكتيين و بنقبل بيهم
ربنا يرزقك بواحدة تكون بتتمناها سواء بقي يكون جواز صالونات ولا عن حب المهم ان القلوب تتقابل و تحصل بنهم الكميا ;)
يا ريت يا جماعة تشرفوني في مدونتي هبقا مبسوطة بجد
ReplyDeleteبلاها شوية هوا بقي ادخلوا علي شدو الهوي
Hello Hagar
ReplyDeleteSeems eny I mixed your profile details with someone else, 3andy ana di ya setty bas Alex agda3 nas we Cairo agda3 nas we Sohag ya3ny baldeyaty fa agda3 mnhom kolohom :)
Still you are lucky en el 3er2 el modern bey3'leb 3ala el 3er2 el se3eedy :) 3andena el 3er2 el open minded beyfdal mawgood bas fag2a el donia betdalem :) 3'aleban sera3 agyal or 7adarat ba2a :)
Anyway, shewaya gad ba2a :)
Sometimes what's good for me might not be good for you. Marriage is like many other decisions, bet7komoh 7agat keteer, previous experience in one of many things. el experience hena momken tekoon tagroba or tagarob fashla either ma3 el gawaz or ma3 el nos el tany mn el 3alam. or momken tekoon en el wa7ed shaf gawazt keteer fashla fa mesh 3ayez yefshal like them, or en el wa7ed shaf tafaseel keteer we tadkholat 3ameeka fi el gawazat fa mesh 3ayez waga3 dema3'. tokoos el khotooba wel gawaz fi masr momken tekoon mor3eba le ba3d el nas, wana lel asaf wa7da menhom. el experience momken tekoon bebasata en e7tayagt el wa7ed betakhtalef. fi wa7da 3ayza tetgawez 3ashan tegeeb awlad, fi wa7da 3ayza yekoon leeha beteha, fi wa7da 3ayza ragel yedal3ha, we fi wa7da 3andaha kol dah we betdawar 3ala 7aga tanya. fa dah yekhaleena nerga3 lel no2ta elly ana 2oltaha fi el awal, elly yemken yenfa3 le shakhs momken maynfa3sh lel shakhs el tany. we 3ala fekra kelmet el tagroba ana mesh hsyafaha 3'alat. we ya3ny goz el gazma mesh aham mn goz el wa7da, lw kont bagarab goz el gazma fa mn bab awla eny agarab el shakhs elly hakhod ma3ah ta2beeda. fekeret enk tes7y kol yoom ma3 nafs el shakhs fekra mor3eba. fekret aslan enek fi goz2 mn ur personal space haydee3 fekra mor3eba, fekret en el ragel fi masr or el mogtama3 haytawaka3 enek tekoony tab3a lel ragel we mafeesh aslan personal space fekra akthar ro3ban. even lw bet7eby wa7ed we te3rafeeh ba2lek 100 sana, mahma 3erfteeh lama el bab yet2fel we ne2ool action dah gawaz mesh le3b el donia betkhtelef. living with a person 24/7 isn't something easy. fa mara akheera as i told you awl mara. Marraige might be the RIGHT thing BUT should never be done for the WRONG reasons
عموما يا شيماء ماتخافيش من الجواز ادخلي بقلب جامد و مايهمكيش لان كدة هتفضلي طول عمرك خايفة منه
ReplyDeleteHi guys again :)
ReplyDeletemohaly i didn't get your point in the begining. but I think that ur word (losing) isn't true.every one of us know that after marriage alot of things will be changed.so u will (CHANGE NOT LOSE). and it's not only you but also she will change alot of things like you.and this isn't related to any nationality at all whether this is an egyptian girl or even coming from mars.
wy ba3den ya mohaly mafesh khof 3lak coz I know that u won't take such astep with a girl if u rn't sure that she will share with u everything u r seeking to achieve (dreams and every moment in your life).
so good luck wy rbna yerzo2ak by bnt el halal ely nefsak feha orayeb 3shan enta bgd 7ad kowayes wy 3shan nefra7 bek ba2a, hane3ml lek a7la far7 3la el blog bta3ak :D ;)
HAGAR : thanks ya gamela for your nice words :) but by the way I'm agirl not a guy :D
wy aked aked 3yza ana kman atgawez zay kol el bnat ya3ny yemkn msh delwa2ty bas isa nawya mafesh 7ad 3aref nasebo emta wla fan :) rbna yerzo2ek enty kman by ebn el halal orayeb ;)
Thank You Only Love, changing is fine, losing is not. It has to be a win-win.
ReplyDeleteI really hope to find the right girl soon coz I am almost fedup of succeeding lewa7dy, even success is not that great when you do it alone!
awlaan ya gama3a el mawdoo3 da gamed moot fe3lan we fe nas mostafeza fe3lan we nas fe3lan rbena ykamelha be 3a2laha we yekteblaha el 5eer kolo.
ReplyDeleteama 3n el nas elly rbena haysahelah 2orayeb en sha2 allah fa ya anesa hagar ana m3aky fe kol kelma enty 2olteha bas han2ool eah lel 3alam el ...... blash
3moman 2aloha 7ekma el 3'aba2 leah naso tab3an msh asdy enty ya hagar wel a3'beya 3arfeen nafsohom kwayes :D
ama 3n el nas el mostafeza
fa ya set shamo2a ya ho2a ya no2a kano zaman be2olo 3leky fe fwazeer sherihan : talaboha et3azezet 5ataboha etganezet..
we dayman kda ebn adam ma bey7esesh be 2emet el 7aga ela lma tede3 meno y3ny lma msh hatla2y la 7ob wla salonat wla 7ata kalb mashy fel share3 hayegy yhawa haw 3liky hat2oly yaah da ana kont 3abeta fe3lan we taysha ya retny we ya retny ana ely 3amalt da kolo fe nafsy
ah 3la fekra ana ma 3rftkosh be nafsy ana eng:\mada basha from alex
note a5era:
m3lesh ya mohaly enta be shaklak dah a5rak gawaz shaware3 msh salonat 7ata :D:D
bahazar m3ak rabena ysahelak be izn allah we ydek 3la ad neyetak lw 2ased 5er aw ased shar bel mwdoo3 dah.
we ya shaima2 eb2y 2ableny aslan lw 7ad baselek.2o3ody e7lamy keda en haygelek wa7ed yotlob edek fel saloon wenty we arahnek la hatshofeeh fel saloon wla hatshofeh fel matba5 7ata 5leky nayma ganb omek ya 7aga :P we eft7elek dar aytam we 2o3ody rabehom 3ashan yetla3o metrahbneen we zahdeen fel donya aw yetla3o bayzeen we mofseden fel ard zayek :D :( :)
Ahlan mada basha, it is really nice to know en the future I will have less dogs barking at me :)
ReplyDeleteIt is even more promising I will end up with no dogs around.
I just hope these dogs will start by one less, someone from Alex *Hint Hint*
لو كل كلب عوى ألقمته حجراً لكان الحصى الصاع بدينار
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ReplyDeleteThank You Anon (name?)
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